Humor: Food that Causes Grief And Suffering And A Catholic Heart Attack

Humor 1:-

Food That Causes Grief and Suffering

A Doctor was addressing a large audience.

‘The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us sitting here, years ago. Red meat is awful. Soft drinks corrode your stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG. High fat diets can be disastrous and none of us realizes the long-term harm caused by the germs in our drinking water. But, there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all, and we all have, or will, eat it. Can anyone here tell me what food it is that causes the most grief and suffering even years after eating it?’

After several seconds of quiet, a 75-year-old man in the front row raised his hand and softly said, ‘Wedding Cake.’
 

Humor 2:

A Catholic Heart Attack

  
A man suffered a serious heart attack and had open heart bypass surgery. He awakened from the surgery to find himself in the care of nuns at a Catholic Hospital. As he was recovering; a nun asked him questions regarding how he was going to pay for his treatment. 
  
She asked if he had health insurance. He replied, in a raspy voice, ‘No health insurance.’ 

  
The nun asked if he had money in the bank. He replied.  ‘No money in the bank.’ 
  
The nun asked, ‘Do you have a relative who could help you?’ 
  
He said, ‘Oh.., I only have a spinster sister, who is a nun.’ 
  
The nun became agitated and announced loudly, ‘Nuns are not spinsters!  Nuns are married to God.’ 

 
Feeling chastized..the patient replied, “Please Send the bill to my brother-in-law..”
 

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